Short Love Story x

Dear Edward,

                 I remember when we would visit the seaside together. Your tanned face would glow in the illuminated light. The beaming clouds clustered together and drifted throughout the sky.

I remember how you would hold me close. Pulling my waist securely near your’s so I would feel content. For you were my armour, my greatest protection. The sand percolated between my toes. I could feel rocks jabbing my feet and making them go scarlet, however, I didn’t care.

I remember your kind chocolatey eyes and your beautiful laugh that could make anybody instantly fall for you.

I remember the first time you whispered ‘I love you.’ into my ear. I felt like I was travelling at the speed of sound. Beads of sweat emerged from my forehead and butterflies invaded my stomach. That was when I knew. You were my galaxy.

I remember when I was away from you, life got harder. My mind felt overwhelmed with pain. My Mum thought I was pathetic for getting ‘too emotional’. Like my depression was an excuse. She would barge into my room and yell ‘Going out, be back soon.’ When she eventually returned she always stank of cheap lager and aftershave. Left me for days with nothing.

I remember the night it all happened. I hadn’t eaten in days. My stomach had swollen up like a bee sting and my head pounded, like I was bashing it on the ground, continuously. Mum burst in the battered front door, stumbling over the carpet and knocking over shoes. Feeling my pale face instantly turning red. My eyes flooded with tears from hatred of my devil mother. ‘Where have you been?’ I screeched. ‘Shut up you piece of crap, I told you I was at the bloody pub didn’t I?’ she slurred. My chest felt quelled against my ribcage, I physically couldn’t breathe. ‘What are you just standing there for? Go to bed you moron!’  She screamed, while trying to keep her blurred gaze on me. Her prominent eyebrows arched downwards as she stared intently at me ‘I never wanted you!’  She bellowed. Charging towards me and smacking my skinny forearm. It ached and stung supremely. Every time I answered back. Anytime.

I remember feeling so hopeless. My own mother. I couldn’t even call her my mother. That beast. Clambering up our narrow stairs and into my bedroom. I buried my head in my dusty pillow and sobbed for hours, not knowing the point in living anymore.

I remember waking up to tedious buzzing. My eyes were puffy from the previous night and you were trying to call me, repeatedly. I instinctively picked up. ‘Hello?’ I murmured through the mobile.  

‘Oh thank God you’re okay!’ You took a deep breath for relief.

‘What? I’m fine.’ I sniffled. The thing that I loved most about you was your ability to read me like a newspaper. ‘I saw your Mum coming out of a hotel this morning and she said she’d ‘taught you a lesson’, and I know what she’s like.’ I hung up. You were the only thing that was good in my distraught life. I couldn’t allow you to get involved, or you would just end up hating me like everybody else did.

I remember taking a brisk walk in the woods to calm my anxiety. The orban leaves crackled under my feet. My copper hair swirled in the soft breeze as the sun weaved between the twisted trees, causing the beams to blaze in my eyes.

I remember approaching the wetlands of the woods, where nobody ever crossed. It was a large, deep bog with rocks scattered around. Never knowing why nobody ventured through it, but anything was better than going home.

I remember perching myself on a rounded rock. It was as if I was crossing stepping stones to another planet, where there was no suffering. Catching sight of a large stone, with moss draped over the top of it. It was further away than the previous ones had been, but I figured I could leap onto it with ease.

I remember swaying my arms back and forth to gain momentum. I remember springing up into the air and feeling the droplets of rain

cleansing me. I remember lowering my foot onto the stone. Slipping. Reflexing my arm out to save myself from the marsh. There was a pointy stick, cemented into the bog. My wrist clasped it.

I remember crimson blood, pouring out of my wrist. Gripping it so tightly, like a pen in an English exam. My lungs felt as if they were collapsing. My feet swiftly started to sink, I struggled to move. I couldn’t use my hands to even attempt to escape. As fast as a flame, the mud had reached my thighs, rendering my legs useless.

I don’t remember my dad, he was just one of Mum’s many boyfriends, he didn’t want me, and neither did she. No friends at school. They would treat me like an invalid. You were the only person who had ever loved me. I squeezed my eyes shut to tried and distract myself from the pain. Clenching my fists and trying to hold back the tears that were urging to withdraw from my face. The bright sun, proceeding to irritate me, flickering upon my eyes.

I remember hearing footsteps. Loud, forceful footsteps. I turned my head to see you sprinting towards me. The mud oozed around my waist and anchored me to the ground. When I saw you, I cried with thankfulness that somebody cared enough to save me. You were the light to my path, the medicine for my heart. My world.

I remember you clutching underneath my arms thrusting me up. However, it was pulling me down too forcefully. ‘What the hell were you thinking?’ You shouted, yet your voice still consisted of your gentleness. I lowered my head and refused to reply. I tried to keep you out of my horrendous life, yet here you were. Still pulling me, each time with more force than the last.

I remember seeing you getting tired. I was shoulder deep. There was no point. I was going to die there. It’s not like I was important to the world anyway.

I remember your face turning amber. You appeared so frustrated. ’You tried your best and I love you for that’ I squeaked calmly with tears gradually slipping down my pink cheeks. ‘It’s not good enough! Do you think I’m just going to leave you here to die?’ My wrist was agonising. I was beginning to feel light-headed. Each part of my body was becoming more numb by the second.

… Darkness.

******

‘Zara!’

I remember rising up in bed with doctors rushing in and out of the room, monitoring the machines next to me. ‘Where am I?’ I whispered. You were by my side, holding my hand and rubbing my fingers. Mum was there too. She looked exhausted and was wearing no makeup. ‘I managed save you, but you fainted from blood loss from your wrist…’ There was a long pause. They must have thought I had done it myself. The doctors would never believe me if I told them otherwise, since had previously been diagnosed with clinical depression. ‘I...’ I burst into tears and you held me in your arms and rocked me like a baby. Mum scowled at me. The cuts on my wrists had been stitched up, but above was an immense purple bruise.

 I remember when Mum saw me stare at it, she flinched away. You saw the bruise too, but proceeded to hug me tightly. ‘It was an accident…’ I muttered, but you interrupted

‘I understand.’ You spoke in such a calm tone all of the time and never failed to amaze me.

I remember the doctor asking everybody to leave the room. This was the moment I dreaded. He sat down on the navy-blue seat next to me and asked ‘Zara, how did you inflict these injuries on your wrist? Remember that this is completely confidential so you can tell me anything.’ He thought I was a psychopath, but maybe I was.  

‘No, this is a misunderstanding, I fell and cut it on a sharp stick.’ I wasn’t sure whether he believed me or not but he nodded. ‘And this large bruise on your forearm? Was that from the fall?’

I remember panicking. ‘Well… My Mum got drunk one night and…’ I mumbled. ‘Enough said on that one.’ He stood up and left the room.

Straight away, you flooded in with a hopeful smile. ‘What did he say?’ You enquired

‘Everything’s going to work out for us.’  I peered through the thick blinds and saw Mum being pulled to one side of the dormant corridor. I turned away so that she could not imprint her stare into my conscience. I faced you. Your stunning eyes blinked at me and that was when you said;

‘You are my galaxy.’

Love Zara

Hope you guys enjoyed this (long) short story and comment if you want more stuff like this in the future

Anonymous girl xxx